A week after Dad died, Mom and I went to the library to get her some books. Mom was walking down the aisles kinda zombie-like, so I started pulling books for her. Finally, a title caught my eye - "The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake." I opened it up to read the synopsis - and BAM! There it was - a post-it on the inside cover that read, "YOU ARE NEVER ALONE." We were speechless. She still has the post-it. It was obviously for her. I often find myself thinking about whoever put it in the book - how did they know? Could they ever guess the impact?
We didn't know it, but these types of experiences would keep happening.. strangers impacting our grief in positive ways, and like this (the most dramatic of the stories), the stranger will never know the relief and comfort it brought us.
Another story I like to share is about a kind cashier. When we were preparing for Dad's funeral, we had to run to CVS to get photos printed and buy frames to put throughout the church. The woman at the cash register asked us what the photos were for, and she was stunned by our answer - probably as stunned as we were to be doing this chore. She was so thoughful and comforting. She took a deep breath and slowed down... she offered her sympathy... then she discounted the entire purchase and might have even given us the photos for free. I can't remember. She told us she was going to buy a candle at the end of her shift and light it in Dad's memory until it burned out.
I don't think I have ever taken the time to show that kind of attention to a stranger's loss. But, knowing now how much it meant to us, I hope I have the chance to pay it forward one day.
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